indifferent...

I'm beginning to not give a shit... I don't think that's a good thing. I don't think it's acceptance. And I don't think I'm living a fulfilling life.

So how do I stop this? I tried talking and it worked a little bit. Again, I just am tired of working at this. I want to feel like somebody's whole world. Not if it's convenient for me. Relationship. 4 months after 28ish years together doesn't seem like a long time. I know other couples who have been separated for far longer, but were they separated for good reasons? Or were they separated for the shit I'm going through? For example military families, I get that you're going off to do your duty and sometimes it's months or a year that you're separated and you don't really know what's going on in that person's life and honestly I don't know how people do that? Especially when we are so connected and so together and so involved and now it's like... Shady shit! Not being totally open with each other. Not talking about hopes and dreams...