last night...

 So we are sitting in the living room.  I am on the far end of the couch because Nutmeg is a brat, and Jerry is in the recliner in the corner.  He has his phone, texting away and smiling.  Instantly I am transported to January.  That feeling sucks, so I go to bed and cry.  I get up to get water, and he has lost his ring.  I thought it was his amethyst, but it was his wedding band.  At first, I was like, "Karma dude," but I feel bad.  It sucks losing a ring.   Later he tells me he is talking to Cortney about clients in Canada...

This morning, I had an emotional outpouring and asked him if he was happy he was home and why.  I think I still need to get an answer to why....I told him how I felt last night and that his behavior instantly transported me back to January.  He said to me, "I told you who I was talking to..." which I said, "Hours later.." and he apologized for making me feel that way.  I told him last night was not fun.  He said he was trying to make a nice dinner and watch the draft with me, and I told him it felt like it was more for him.  he wasn't "With me" last night.  He was in his own little bubble. 

I'm so tired of trying.